The idea that we think this, we do that, oh no we couldn’t possibly agree with that, is in fact absurd. Of course, one of the wonders of being in a relationship is you grow together and become like-minded, knowing how each other feels about a matter, and their likes and dislikes. But does this now mean that one can speak on behalf of the other on such matters which requires an opinion?
The intricacies of each couple’s relationship are different, much like the intricacies of each individual. This is why I do not necessarily agree with stereotypical roles in the house. I like to think that DH and I are not only husband and wife, but we are a partnership. We both take it in turns to do the cooking, cleaning, looking after DS and being the breadwinner. There is nothing that I should only do because I’m a woman, nor does it mean that DH is excused from from the hoovering. What we choose to do depends on our preferences; we have a night time routine for DS’ 10PM feed, I change his nappy and DH feeds him. It’s what suits us, not society’s ideal.
It may be odd to an outsider when I say that DH will be finishing his degree this year whilst caring for DS, and I will become breadwinner. I think it’s unfair that just because he’s a man, he doesn’t get the same kindness and understanding I had in my final year when I had to juggle DS with my studies. Despite this, I love how this has panned out; DS grows up with both his mother and father in his life, and we both have the opportunity to get our degrees and work periodically. Best of both worlds.